When I went to the Cider Mill over the weekend, I was not just shocked by the fact that people eat peanuts with candy corn. I, in fact, was also mesmerized by the giant apple at the Robinette Cider Mill. As you may have guessed, my interest in giant cement, fiberglass, or wooden food items never wanes. Afterall, a mall that I worked at during college had a play are where you could climb all over gigantic breakfast foods. Some had steps or slides on them.
The apple just sits casually amid the picnic tables with a sign on the side that says “Please Don’t Climb.” If I was eight years old, I would consider this a mere request and not any sort of edict. Of course I was a polite child and honored polite requests, but sometimes I fell to reverse psychology. Most likely, I probably had James and the Giant Peach read to me in class that week, so was still surrounded by the world view that it was thorughly normal to interact with giant fruit. In fact, it was expected. It was something, like growing up and being Wonder Woman, that you can look forward to in the future. Just be patient, and it too will happen for you.
What I was most impressed by is the shading of the apple. This wasn’t just your typical roller job on the paint. No, sir. The apple had dimension to its paint job, or at least I imagined it. What I didn’t ask is what variety the apple it was supposed to be. It didn’t quite have that deep hue of a red delicious. It didn’t have the splashes of yellow and pale, almost pastel red that Fuji apples have. Is it possible to just have a “generic apple” sitting out there? I find it hard to believe that someone whose life is apples just made up a generic one to represent all Apple-Americans of all heriteges and experiments there of.
I wonder if Gwyneth Paltrow’s daughter, Apple, is going to be called Crab Apple at school. Maybe her boyfriend will call her Golden Delicious if she is blonde. Maybe, and we can hold out hope on this one, she will grow up and marry a nephew of Denzel Washington’s. That would be lucky for all of us, as in the phone book, she would be listed as Washington, Apple. I know, we can only dream about that one, can’t we?
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3) The Fairy Godmother’s Bake a Cake for Aurora (Sleeping Beauty). They don’t really bake it. It’s raw. And they use any cups and mugs they have to measure it out. Sounds like me.





