This post brought to you by FRESCHETTA®. All opinions are 100% mine.

One of my readers has a chance to win a free Freschetta Simply…Inspired Pizza, plus a snifty (snazzy-nifty) new bamboo cutting board with the accessories to lay out a great appetizer display. Read on for details on how to win!

When I was in grade school, my parents moved to a two cow and one horse town (the horse actually got loose and ran around on the playground once) where the highlight of the week was eating a frozen pizza from the one grocery store and then going out for an ice cream. No, there wasn’t a pizza place, so the ice cream shop constituted a big spending night out. The pie was inevitably backed in cardboard and shrink wrapped with a cactus on the label. (What did pepperoni pizza have to do with some abandoned Old West ghost town? After all, it wasn’t as if they had baked beans and rattlesnake or bison as toppings.)

“Mom, let me open it.” Yes, the pie was so close, but yet so far under the clear shrink plastic.

“Here’s the kitchen scissors.”

“I can get my finger nail under the edge. What’s wrong with this?”

Two seconds later, a vacuum-pack pressure seal burst and mozzarella showered the floor.

I haven’t had a pizza from the grocery store in a few moons, mostly because of the deep-seated trauma, and I was quite surprised by the advances Humankind has made.

This past week, I tried a new FRESCHETTA® Simply…Inspired™ Pizza thanks to Freschetta. (Look them up on Twitter @FreschettaSI or “like” them on Facebook at www.facebook.com/FreschettaSimplyInspired) Six standard-issue flavors and three limited edition combinations are stocked at your local grocer. The varieties are more akin to those at a gourmet pie factory rather than the standard fare at take out pizza counters. If you are a fan of Bertucci’s on the East Coast, Crust, or California Pizza Kitchen (the restaurant, not the frozen pizza), this will be slightly more to your liking than a $5 Hot and Ready at Caesar’s. The Classic Bruschetta, which appeared at the Snack Hound test kitchen, features a garlic pesto base rather than a tomato sauce—a boon for acid-reflux suffers. A smattering of chopped Roma tomatoes, fresh basil and roasted garlic top a three cheese blend. Basically, its a Margherita pizza with a cream rather than a tomato base.

The crust is wafer thin compared to other Freschetta pizza offerings, and I caution you to cook the pizza on the lean end of the 14-17 minute time allotment. Then again, I used a pizza stone, so there is that margin of error. For best results, set the timer for ten minutes and then check it if cooking on a stone or using a convection oven. For traditional ovens, check it after 12. The crust will approach a golden brown, but you might be one of those folks who just like the heat to glance at the cheese. Pan seared Mozzarella, anyone?

What most impressed me was the expiration date on the pizza. Yes, it actually had one. Mine was purchased April 23rd and expired in July. This is most likely why I was not overwhelmed with the sodium-heavy taste of many instant pizzas. It simply doesn’t have the dearth of preservatives. The Fresch-Taste Seal package is a plastic, recyclable tray with a peel off top. It really does lock the flavors in. I know you will miss the exercise of poking shrink wrap with a tooth pick, but it does use 30% less packaging than the traditional boxed frozen pizzas.

The taste of the pizza did not have a strong sodium bouquet like I am used to for frozen pizzas. The basil added just the right amount of sweetness. Due to the very thin crust, I would recommend cooking up two pizzas if two hungry but not gluttonous adults were making a meal of it with no salad or appetizers. The perfect application would be as a fancy appetizer at a party. Cut up the pizza into thin slices and serve on a cutting board.

Bottom line, would I buy these? I wouldn’t buy them for any linebacker-like brothers and his linebacker friends, but would definitely buy them if I wanted a bit of a more upscale pizza experience.

Speaking of cutting boards, are you ready to win? One of my lucky readers receives a small round bamboo cutting board that swivels to hide the perfect utensils for serving cheeses and other appetizers. You will also receive a certificate to redeem for a Freschetta Simply Inspired Pizza from your grocer.

To enter:

1) Comment on this blog post: Each comment laureat will receive one entry.

2) Tweet: Tweet this post to your friends. Include @TheSnackHound in your tweet, that way I’ll be able to find it and give you an additional entry.

3) Follow @TheSnackHound on Twitter. Leave me a comment here to let me know with your twitter handle if its not obvious.

4) Blog about this post with a link back.

So..you have a total of four chances to win. Winner will be determined by random number generator.

Contest Closes May 8th.

Reader must reside in the Continental USA or Canada to win.

My Favorite Guy and I sometimes joke about miniature ice cream bon bons. A requirement of eating said dessert is to eat them right out of the box while sitting in a scented bubble bath and watching soap operas or Oprah on a wall-mounted bathroom tv. We just aren’t the demographic for that. However, we both love Dove chocolate and Dove Ice Cream bars and by default just cannot say know to Dove Miniatures. They are more of a mini-bar than a bon bon.

We just have to eat them in a manly way, such as putting them on ice and throwing them in the back of the wood trailer and eating them on a break. Just make cutter oil from the chain saw doesn’t get near it. Gravel contamination is fine. Then, there is the woman on the go method. Since dark chocolate is good for you, eat one as a necessary dietary supplement along with your iron pill, and to those who it applies to, half a prenatal vitamin. Suddenly, when it is thus rationed it doesn’t seem so indulgent. I know. With the new Cafe collection, you can replace your morning coffee with Java Chip miniatures.  At 70 calories, you can just jog around your office a few times and it would be like you never had one.

Dove is running “My Mini Moment” contest, where ladies can submit a dossier of their mini moment of escape. A lucky winner will get a mini-getaway to Napa Valley, a mini room makeover or spa treatments for a year. Sounds decadent. I wonder of Dove would give me a year’s supply of Dove if I won, or should I say WHEN i win?

To win…I mean..to enter to win… visit DoveIceCream.com/myminimoment and submit your essay by June 7, 2010.  That is only 21 days from now, so hop to it.

I receive a whole sackful of emails every day about this wellness solution, that supplement or that healthful tip every day. Well, of course it is not a sack, since it is email. If I printed them all out, it would be a sack. Okay, a virtual sack. That would be wasteful if I printed them out just to prove a point. Those burlap or canvas sacks are something I miss, however. Makes one feel like Santa Claus, or at least a Beatle. At any rate, sometimes I nod and say “oh, that’s nice,” but sometimes the siren song shrieks and I must click a link to read more, or I must google or yahoo or whatever the generic term is in order to see if there is any debunking going on. If I had to guess, I would say that I waste a total of one hour a day on it.

My biggest consideration right now is looking for ways to increase my Vitamin D intake while still slathering on the sunscreen, inventing a magic wand to make dark chocolate even more antioxidant rich and also giving it powers to magically clean my office, and toning my problem areas.  I don’t know if I will be able to ever accomplish #2, but I found some solutions for number #1. With my grandfather having osteoporosis, I better start cramming myself with it now.

Luckily, there is www.wellnessdaily.com. It is a new site that extrapolates all the Twitterful, Feed-ed, and Spooled health information from all over the ‘net. All I need is to go there, find what I want and avoid reading what I don’t. Honestly, I don’t know what “Spooled” means in this context, but it sounds better than to say that I am unraveled.

Right now, there is a Twitter contest. You can earn a year’s supply of Jennie-O products or even a gym membership Just follow @wellness_daily & RT this! http://bit.ly/tbd123.  There is a complete list of rules HERE.

Well, you lucky ducks who live across the Port Huron-Sarnia bridge, you are eligible for a chance of a lifetime to win a prize pack of Clubhouse Gravy packets and an apron! I am so excited for you. In fact, I think I am going to look up some folks I have not seen since about sixth grade and share the news with them.  They will either not remember me or think that my brain finally turned into a pile of goo. Or is it gravy? Yes, I am a bit more excited than if the prize were a kitchen makeover or a cruise, because then only one person would win. I just have a sneaking suspicion that there will be more than one winner. It could be YOU!  and YOU! Woohoo!

To enter, just putter over to the newsletter sign-up and contest entry and sign yourself up. Just remember, the contest is open to Canadian residents only.  All of you folks who live NEAR Canada don’t count. If you point to your hand at any time to explain to someone where you live, then you don’t qualify.  Sorry.  Even if you somehow live on a barge in the middle of Lake Huron or in the Detroit River.  “Hey, that’s international waters,” you say. Just look at your license plate. If it has a crown on it, you’re in.  If it says “The Great Lakes State,” then unfortunately and sadly, you’ll have to buy your own gravy packets.

What is the point of gravy in a pack?  You add the contents to drippings form the meat cooked to make a hearty, homemade gravy.  For some of us, its a little difficult to get everything right.  Consistency, color, and oh yeah…flavor…is important.  Clubhouse Gravy packs make sure that all the boxes are ticked and its on the table by dinner time. In fact, they have a gravy tips video to help you along.  There are selections for turkey, beef and more. Oh, and then there is the mysterious poutine. That is something I have never been able to get my head around. The idea of gravy on french fries just seems a bit too exotic for me. But its not french fries with gravy. That’s a bit simplistic.  It’s poutine.

While I once thought poutine was an adaptation of a traditional dish, it really happened as an accidental restaurant invention 1957.  Cheese curds were glopped on top of fries.  Later, the gravy somehow entered into the equation.  Either way, by the 1970s, poutine had reached North American domination.  But not really.  Disco was being invented and the two just could not coexist.  So to this day, poutine remains a French Canadian comfort food and has yet to be sold at American fast food restaurants.

I digress (what a surprise).

If you win, please write in and let me know. I would love to document the historic day.

The General’s chicken at Mei Ling’s had just a slight crunch or firmness to the coating. I later abandoned it for healthier fare, but for awhile I was on a General Gao’s chicken kick. Wait a minute, its General Tso. Whatever his name is, he made a pretty mean coating. Later, I found out that the slightly crunchy coating is so wrong. If you were really in Szechuan or wherever its from, the chicken should be a little more soggy and soft. I am not about to join the fan club for soggy anytime soon.

Can you imagine me winning a trip to China and sidling up to the counter to have a side of the General’s Secret Recipe, and telling people when I got back that Medford, Massachusetts, had better Chinese food than China does?  Well, perhaps for those very reasons, I will never win a trip to China. I could, however, win a Blu-ray disc player from  Sun-Bird.   No, I am not talking about the late model car.  Sun-Bird makes all sorts of seasoning mixes for Asian food that you can use in the safety of your own home.   If you want to go ahead and make your General’s Chicken crunchy or soggy, you can go ahead.  No members of the Food Police are going to come after you (as far as I know).

The Food Police may drive up to you and pull you over in China, however.  They are not there to arrest you, but to clue you in that the General’s chicken is not traditional Chinese food!  It was invented by a Hunan chef from Taiwan who emigrated to New York City.  Allegedly, the world only started shouldering the responsibility of producing the crunchy or chewy dish in the 1970s.  I don’t know when Sun-Bird first introduced its General Tso seasoning pack, but they do make one.  I always wanted to experiment to see if General Tso’s shrimp could be invented.   Maybe I will have to invent it this week.

To make the Sun-Bird General Tso, you will need to pick up a few additional ingredients. Soy sauce, oil, flour, and sugar are things that you will need to add the spice too.  Whoops.  You will need chicken, too, unless you want to be generous and make shrimp or tofu.

Sun-Bird is available at your favorite grocery store, and your least favorite one, most likely, too.  It is up to you to decide whether you prefer to have award winning customer service or not.  We are not going to force you.  To enter to win a Blu-Ray player, pick up an entry form.  They are located in your grocery store’s Asian aisle.  If your store doesn’t have an Asian aisle, don’t panic.  Wander over to the “ethnic” or “International” aisle.   Hurry up.  The contest ends October 31, 2009.   After that, you will have to just break down and buy your own Blu-Ray, knowing that you can’t possibly win because you didn’t enter.

**= Actually, Out and About is not really spelled that way in Canada.  It doesn’t sound that way either, but its the closest I could get.  Some people who grew up watching the CBC, such as myself, and some of my Canadian friends raise to mid vowels with the onset of a dipthong when proceeded by a voiceless obstruent or a mild plosive like p, b, k, or t at the end of a word. 

In fact, I was listening to the radio while I was painting, and they were advertising what sounded like the most awesome ice cream place since awesome came to awesome town. I went to go look for it, but I was so upset because it was over the bridge! Literally, I could have ran a mile down the street, walked across the bridge and told the dude or the dudette on the other side of the bridge that they needed to tell me where that ice cream place was because it was an ice cream emergency of international proportion. Unfortunately, I looked like a hobo in my painting clothes and I didn’t have my birth certificate with me, nor an enhanced license, nor a passport. Of course, there is delicious ice cream in the United States, but it is about what you can’t have!

If you are fortunate enough to be able to wave at me across the river, pointing to your big old waffle cone and laughing, you are eligible to enter to win a kitchen makeover.  Yes, that’s right.  Maple Leaf markets is giving away a $32,000 kitchen makeover. Yup, $32,000 big ones.  Also, other lucky winners will receive one of 12 Frigidaire® fridges.

What is the meaning of all this?  Maple Leaf Market has launched a new website that features meal ideas and more.  There are new personable characters on the website: The Butcher, The Baker, and the Candlestick Maker.  I’m only kidding.  There is no Candlestick Maker.  It’s a Pasta Maker.

I don’t know what kind of integrated technology it is, but the aforementioned people do little demos for you. It is like you are at Maple Leaf on sample day, and you are walking around. It is not a video that you have to start in a traditional way. Also, check out what they do when they are done with their demos. They just sort of look around like they are waiting for the next person to come by.   I am just completely intrigued by this.  The lady at left is The Baker.

Unfortunately, these people don’t come with the new kitchen if you win. You will have to make all of your own stuff. Bummer. You can’t win, though, if you don’t enter. If you live in Canada, you can enter once every single day on the new Maple Leaf website. Just enter your email address where it tells you and you are good to go to win the Dream Kitchen or a brand new Fridge.

As for my relatives, they were tearing out the kitchen two weeks ago.  I am going to suggest putting a lasso around the whole thing.  They can wait until the river freezes and then pull it a half a mile across the water.  Then, they will be in Canada and can win a kitchen.  However, I am sure that the expense of moving a two story home across the ice would completely eat up any profit or cost savings from winning a free kitchen.  I would be happy enough to win a fridge.  However, it would be a real let down to put that much effort in and just get the fridge.

Well, they are out of luck, but good luck to YOU!

It is a contest to roll out its new line of paninis with an international flair.  They include:

Bistro Meatballs & Peppers
Bistro Chicken Souvlaki
Lean Cuisine Grilled Vegetables & Goat Cheese
Lean Cuisine Mango Chicken Tikka

Since panini is native to Italy, and these all aren’t Italian dishes, there have been creative liberties taken.  The Chicken Tikka is a panini with an Indian flair, and includes a spiced sauce, grated cheese, and mango.   I think the one I would most like to try is the Grilled Veggie and Goat Cheese panini.

Oh, you want me to stop talking and start telling you about the goods? Okay, then.  There are three first prize winners who will receive a trip to Greece, India, France, or Italy in the form of a $10,000 gift card to do so.   Twelve second prize winners will win a Sony digital camcorder.  Everyone else who does not win any of that will still have chances every day o win instant prizes of Stouffers products.

You can register here  on the Stouffers website.  Make sure you have a valid Canadian address.  If you are living in Canada for work for some reason, have a friend hold your hand or strap it into your pocket so you are not tempted to point to a knuckle.

The prizes that BluFrog, the latest “healthy” energy drink, has in store include a trip to the X Games in Vail, Colorado. There are other prizes, such as a Richard Petty racing experience, if snow and you do not mix. If you just don’t “do” the outdoors as all and want to sit on your keister, there is an Ultimate Gaming Experience.

Go to the BluFrog page and follow the instructions. You may tweet, blog, or comment to win. Anyone can enter, but only those who are 18 or over, and are also legal residents of the United States may win.  More details on the prizes and rules can be found on the page.   You can view it here with a superduper magnifying glass, changing the resolution on your screen to see The Snack Hound blog as ants and fleas would see it, or just simply go to the page.

Why am I making such a big deal out of it?  I don’t want you to blame me when you read my blog and wish I would have reminded you.  It is “all you” now.  I did my part, so it is up to you to write it on the calendar or type it in to that little calendar alarm thingie on your phone.

Entering is quite simple.   You get an entry from going to their blog and leaving a comment with which prize you would like to win.  Additional entries can be had by blogging about the contest on your blog, or tweeting about it on Twitter.  If tweeting, you need to include #bluworld and http://bit.ly/UiiJy in your tweet. This way, you share the link with friends, and BluFrog folks will know that you have completed your mission. For those who are hesitant to enter contests, as they do not want their personal information shared,  this method of entry collects no phone numbers or email addresses.

Of course, there are additional rules aside from completing the entry method.  This contest ends at 11:59 p.m. EST on July 17, 2009.  Entries submitted after that time, will not be considered.  There will be no leniency for people who walked away form their computer to brush their teeth.  You had all month to do that.

To win a prize, you must be a legal resident of the United States, and you must be 18 years old or older.   If there is any sort of scuffle about identity, in the case of blogged entries, favor will err on the side of the person the blog is registered to.  In other words, if you are 12 years old and start typing away on your mom or dad’s blog, the joke will be on you.  Your parents will be sending you a postcard from the X Games and you will be sitting at home.  At least that’s the one I would like to win as I hear Aspen is beautiful.  There will be plenty of years after you are 18 to win plenty of other contests, so don’t rush to grow up!

Hal, the surly PC, has randomly generated a winner in the online poster printing contest for a free 16×20 print. All of the data was entered into Hal’s little brain, and the winner is:

Michele Perry

According to Michele’s comment, this is how she is going to use her photo:

I would use my new poster to proudly display my boys, and my new girl Annabelle! (pic coming soon- she’ll be home in a month or so!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

By the way, the boys are dachshunds, in case you were wondering!

Michele’s name and email address has been submitted to Uprinting.com. She will be contacted within a few days to invite her to select her favorite photo to bring REALLY, REALLY big. Thank you for playing, everyone!  Be on the look out for more great contests, recipes, and general mayhem at TheSnackHound.com