TheSnackHound

Church’s Chicken…

First Congregational Church, Detroit,
current location established in 1891…

Location, Location, Location…

The grandest and most brilliant expression of irony, or the biggest “fail” of corporate real estate scouting? When I was a child in Detroit, and later a student, I assumed that I would meet kindred spirits who weren’t sure whether to snicker or marvel at the juxtaposed neighbors. In my years, I have never had another soul even vaguely refer to this in any other way than as if it was routine and ordinary. I sometimes needed to prove to people that the strange parallel universes coexisted, not unlike the skills used in my strange position as one of five people who remember “Can’t Cook/Won’t Cook” or “Manimal” on television.

When I pass, I wonder if the good people of the First Congregational Church were petitioned for their opinions on both restaurant proximity and their sense of humor, and convenience won, or some corporate honcho just saw that the location was on the main drag. You’ve got to give them credit. I would not have been able to tell you where to get chicken sandwiches if it was a few blocks down. My mind wouldn’t have been able to place it. But put it next to the biggest word association billboard there could be, and the brain seals it in.

Now, if you go visit the good people of First Congregational, you will be sure to learn about the “Living Museum” that lies within. If you go to the good people of Church’s, pick me up a side of jalapeno peppers.

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At left: April 17th: National Give Your Tax Preperer Cookies for Putting Up With You Day?

My sister-in-law to be gets a lot of flack. She is a school teacher, and while many think she has an awesome responsibility and a noble job, there is a certain contingency that thinks she has an easy life because she gets summers off to go on gastronomical excursions to France. Little do they know that she doesn’t get paid in the summer unless she chooses a reduced paycheck during the year.

If that is your life goal — to work 8-9 months, then travel without taking leave, the other job might be a tax preparer. You could work 15-16 hour days from January 15th or February 1st through April 15th, or maybe April 30th to clear up all the latecomers, and then pick Cacao beans in Malaysia or tour the vegan barbecue establishments of Vermont. After all, a tax preparer is a tax preparer and not a general accountant.

I didn’t know this before, but you can’t just turn the lights off. There are a lot of  enrolled agent continuing education requirements . Namely, 16 class hours annually of continuing ed. This includes 2 credit hours of a enrolled agent ethics course, 3 hours of tax law updates, and 10 hours comprised of a variety of other tax law classes. Since the IRS requires 72 hours in a three year period, you better get cracking and take more than 16 a year. Gee, that’s like a semester at college.

While it does sound enticing, would I want to deal with ME as a client?

I have a brand new appreciation for the folks who sit across from me at H&R Block and type in my info.  I think I’ll bring in a plate of cookies for the staff. After all, dough is a business expense, isn’t it? They deserve a break and a big party on April 16th. This year, the party is on April 17th, as the 16th is a Monday and that’s the line that separates the late from the conscientious.

So why not make April 17th give cookies to your tax preparer day?

Spice organization has been rolling around in my head lately, since they mostly have been rolling around in my cabinet. In my kitchen, there is an original built-in with several cabinet drawers covered in decades of white paint. No one took the time to remove the hardware, so it too is mummified with just a small white bump where the screws used to go.  It is just not enough for all of the dishes and food, so someone installed a lovely circa 1980 “photo of wood siding” auxiliary counter/drawer/door bank. Lovely.

Inside the adorable 1920s part of the kitchen, the only way to go is to have little caddys and wire shelves and spice racks with the little rubber feet on them. That is so shabby chic/art deco/midcentury-like with just the right hint of Rubbermaid, but what is not accounted for is the gap in the side of the cupboard. Bombs away.

Oh, and forget a wall spice rack, which would be Concussion 101. My kitchen is devoid of wall space with the dormer ceiling. Then there are the drawers – not deep enough to label all the spices on top, but I can lean them. There is a chrome spice rack I saw recently, which I loved. But yikes a 5 lb shipping weight. That sounds more like a car part to me.

I’ll let you know what I decide. For now, its the survival of the fittest – the spices that are in heavy rotation such that they are stationed next to the stove win. Anything that is in the back of the dark cupboard and are starting to clump are voted off the island. Maybe after all of this, I won’t need a spice rack, but just a small little drink coaster to display “THE ONE.”

Right now, Zenni Optical is offering a variety of $6.95 prescription eyeglasses for Valentine’s Day. Some are merely in solid red or pastels, but some are a bit more blatant with cupids and hearts on the arms.

This little number, at left, has the Chinese characters for happiness on the side. That’s a very long string of characters to only mean “Happiness, ” sister. I’m a little suspicious. It’s kind of like a friend who was a foreign exchange student had their sister visit. She asked her sister a question and the sister went on for four minutes and my friend translated, “She said she’s happy.” What??

The glasses may be fine and good bebopping around town, but what if you read the reviews of a new, sit-down, classy restaurant that offered the best Chines cuisine? What if you sat yourself down with your glasses, made it a point to brush your hair away from the arms so the owner of the restaurant could see how coordinated you are to your dining experience, and found out that they way you had smudged something on them, the character has been altered to be perceived as a naughty word? Would everyone laugh or kick you out?

I digress. Cheap eyeglasses can help your coordinate your astigmatism for any occasion, but be really careful out there.